Ditching denial is critical to making changes if one is struggling with addiction or is the family members of someone who is struggling with substance misuse. Why is it such an important first step? And how does one go about doing it?

To answer these questions and others, the Team at  ‘letsmote.com shares the following guest post. ‘letsmote.com is the world’s first Emotional Networking and self-help platform that gives users fun, easy and insightful tools to express and analyze their emotions in complete anonymity, and allows them to connect in real-letsmote time with others feeling the same way. letsmote invites you to visit their blog for exclusive interviews and feature articles and to meet others battling addiction or to connect in real time with those who are helping their loved ones overcome an addiction

Ditching Denial, Befriending Change by the Team at letsmote

Ah denial, that little monster that creeps into your head and fools you into thinking all is as it should be. When an individual is dealing with an unpleasant and stressful situation, denial is also one of the most powerful and quick rising defence mechanisms they turn to. When dealing with a very difficult issue like addiction or substance abuse, denial is a common enemy and friend. You either embrace it totally and completely obstruct the reality of what you are going through or then embrace it in parts to justify certain aspects of your struggles.

Addiction or substance abuse is not an easy thing to deal with, much less alone. Getting the help you need through counseling, rehab, support groups and more can all greatly increase your chances of success. And the recovery period and methods depend largely on the severity of the problem. To come to terms with that, the first thing one needs to do is get your head out of the sand, accept that there is a problem at hand and take the step to make the changes. Easier said than done – maybe so, something that has to be done – oh yeah! Of course, this also applies to any life situation you are feeling stagnant in and know is not making use of your full capabilities.

We say we are in Denial when we deliberately either distort the truth or delete critical information so that we can avoid accepting the truth.

Some of the Important Reasons We Practice Denial

1. When we fear that knowing or facing the truth could be more painful then what we can bear. (My spouse / child / parent doesn’t love me).
2. When we fear accountability and feel incapable of changing the situation.
3. When we don’t want to give up the advantages we think we get from keeping things the same. And the cost of keeping it the same is less than the advantages we get.
4. When our sense of self is damaged.
5. When we are angry, revengeful and carry hatred, towards others or ourselves.

Befriending Change

Acceptance basically gives freedom to create something different, something better. It helps to get help when we need it the most. It increases our connectedness with people and greater engagement in living our lives. After Acceptance comes Change. Changing can be difficult as we may lack the resources required. But even merely attempting to find the ways and will to change makes us better people and more equipped to live life powerfully.

Change is never easy. It comes with its set of upheavals. Even if you know it’s for the better it is often hard to make and harder to come to terms with when you are yearning for the familiar. It is like that piece of gooey chocolate cake you start craving the minute you get on a diet, knowing that too much dessert made you go on a diet in the first place! The familiar however it impacted you is like a warm soft bed on a winter’s day, especially when we just don’t want to or can’t get see how getting out is going to be better. You go through an adjustment period, a change curve if you will.

One fine day when we come to that place of acceptance and realise that change is a friend, one that gives tough love for sure, but one we need, we realise that it was the way to go and how much good is coming out of it. Therefore, it is so important to be in touch with your feelings to even realise that it is happening. Remember, there is no shame in taking that step and reaching out and getting the help you want and will most likely need. All humans have issues; in fact we people are full of absurdities and quirks! Find a place or love and no judgement and begin the road to better things as you wave good-bye to denial….