How to Get Someone to Stop Drinking So Much
Drinking problems often seem to worsen around the holidays, or at least become more obvious, as families gather for extended periods of time and observe drinking behaviors that are too awful and/or too often to ignore or excuse. And then the questions and discussions pick up, again, centered around the search question, “How to get someone to stop drinking so much.”
I want to use this post to share an interview my good friend and fellow professional, Cathy Taughinbaugh, Parent Recovery Coach, and author of the blog, Treatment Talk, conducted with Dr. Jeffrey Foote, Co-Founder and Clinical Director of the Center for Motivation and Change. It centers around an approach known as CRAFT, Community Reinforcement and Family Training, which is designed to help family members get the tools they need to help themselves and in that process, help their loved one get the help he or she needs.
How to get someone to stop drinking so much is a constant worry for many family members and friends.
While this interview is focused on the parent trying to help their child relationship, the information it shares applies to anyone whose loved one drinks (or abuses drugs) too much. To give you a sense of what you’ll find in this interview, “CRAFT Can Help Your Family Change: Meet Dr. Jeffrey Foote,” I quote one of Cathy’s questions and Dr. Foote’s answers, below:
“Can you describe CRAFT for families who know nothing about it?
“The CRAFT approach, developed by Bob Meyers at U of New Mexico, is one set of important tools that DO work, and it feels great to see families using these strategies and getting results, feeling hopeful again, feeling empowered, getting support, learning to trust themselves again, getting their lives and the lives of their children back. What could be better?
“CRAFT is a set of very positive strategies to help you help your child, especially when they are not so sure they want to change. The approach teaches you new ways to interact with them (positive communication skills), and doesn’t implicate or blame the family, but instead supports them as a positive force that is trying to deal with a very difficult situation as best they can.
“By using CRAFT, you learn helpful ways of talking to your child so they are more likely to listen (what we call recognizing green lights and red lights), learn ways of understanding what’s going on from their perspective (what’s “in it for them”), the importance of recognizing positive change when it happens, how to allow them to learn from the natural consequences of their negative behaviors, and importantly, how to take care of yourself in the process.
“Kindness, collaboration, positive reinforcement, and good limit setting…these are all part of real change. What we now know is this: it works! You can stay involved, you can help, and you can take care of yourself as well, and this combination is powerful and effective in helping your child decide to make positive changes.”
If you’ve been grappling with a loved one’s drinking or drug abuse and are looking for tools to help you help them, please read the rest of this interview, “CRAFT Can Help Your FAmily Change: Meet Dr. Jeffrey Foote” for a new approach that may prove to be just what you need.
Lisa Frederiksen
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Interesting post. I’ve never heard of CRAFT before, and it’s something I’ll look in to. I don’t currently have a family, but anything to make things easier in recovery is great.