Collateral Damage of Addiction | Family and Friends
When it comes to addiction treatment, recovery, prevention, intervention… it’s common to focus on the drinker or the drug user. It’s estimated there are more than 23 million Americans who struggle with the brain disease of addiction, of which only 10% are getting the help they need.
What’s little understood is that more than 100 million Americans suffer collateral damage as a consequence of a loved one’s addiction. They are the family members and friends; the people who experience secondhand drinking | secondhand drugging. There are no research-based estimates of how many family members and friends get the help they need. But like their loved ones, it’s likely a very low percentage.
For both, it is the stigma and shame that makes seeking and finding the right kind of help so difficult. As I shared in the post I just linked, The Shame of Addiction, it’s a family disease and all are affected…
I saw it again last night as I faced an audience of drug addicts and alcoholics in treatment and their family members, all of whom were present to hear my lecture.
I saw the crushing emotional pain that surrounds this family disease on their faces, in their body language, in the way they did or did not look me in the eye or venture a tentative smile.
For the addicts | alcoholics, it crossed the spectrum: shame, defeat, anger, embarrassment, defiance, sadness, regret, fear. Shame. For the family members, it crossed the spectrum: shame, defeat, anger, embarrassment, defiance, sadness, regret, fear. Shame.
Some were numb, some still detoxing, some only there because it’s what they were supposed to do. For some, there was hope. For others, it was a last ditch effort. For some, it just was.
Putting a Relationship to the Collateral Damage of Addiction
To put a face to this collateral damage, Rehabs.com “analyzed the top addiction-related forums to find out how friends and family members were seeking support.” This first image is a screen shot from the opening message displayed in their piece, “Collateral Damage: How Drug Addiction Affects Families and Friends,” and answers the question, “Who is Seeking Help?”
Click on this article, “Collateral Damage: How Drug Addiction Affects Families and Friends,” to take a thorough browse through the rest of the information Rehabs.com has compiled.
For Help with the Collateral Damage of Addiction
Consider purchasing my Quick Guide to Secondhand Drinking (the same information applies to Secondhand Drugging) to learn what you can do to help yourself (and through that effort, help your loved one). Another resource I’ve written for this purpose is also a Quick Guide and is titled: Quick Guide to Addiction Recovery: What Helps, What Doesn’t.
And, as always, feel free to call (650-362-3026) or email (lisaf@BreakingTheCycles.com) me with questions – there is no charge.
© 2015 Lisa Frederiksen
Lisa Frederiksen
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