Interview with Jesse Schenker on his recent memoir, All Or Nothing
I finished reading Jesse Schenker’s memoir, All or Nothing, One Chef’s Appetite for the Extreme (Harper Collins, 2014), in which he chronicles his years in “the big, black hole of addiction” that had its start at age 12, when he smoked a joint at a rave and felt “the big wool blanket” he’d been carrying around his whole childhood “suddenly lifted.” Finally, he could escape the “twitchy, anxious part” of himself and his pursuit of that escape drove him into a world of alcohol and drugs, excesses, jail, estrangement from his family and friends and doing things to survive he can’t fully recall. Yet throughout his slide, Jessie found solace and success in cooking food, working for some of the top chefs, in spite of his addiction.
As riveting a read as his downward spiral is reading his path out. Today, Jesse is ten years sober, and at age 31, an Iron Chef winner, James Beard nominee and owner and executive chef of The Gander and the acclaimed Recette restaurants in New York City. Jesse has reunited with his family and is married to the love of his life with whom he is raising their two children.
I invite you to read my interview with Jesse Schenker…
Share a bit about what it was like to be in your skin as a child and young teen? Was there ever a diagnosis for what you were feeling or did you think it was just ‘you?’
Chef Jesse Schenker, author of “All or Nothing: One Chief’s Appetite for the Extreme”
Growing up, I always felt an anxiety that I couldn’t quit put my finger on. I think my parents thought it was just normal kid stuff. As an adult, now I can identify it as anxiety that should have been treated as such. I was trying to curb the feeling fortunately with cooking from an early age but also and unfortunately, with drugs. There was no diagnosis at the time. I thought it was just me, and I was doing whatever I could to feed my appetite for the extreme.
How did your interest in cooking get started and what did cooking do for you that you found so soothing?
I realized my love for cooking at an early age when I began preparing meticulous, homespun meals with my grandmother in Florida. I loved the feeling and just couldn’t get enough.
Describe a day in your life when your addiction was at its worst and contrast that to a day in your life, today.
It’s day and night. I was at the lowest low—dirty, homeless, lonely, dope sick and without anyone to turn to. Today I own two successful restaurants, Recette and The Gander in New York City, am married to love of my life, and have two beautiful children. It’s amazing. I work every day to keep this life.
With 20-20 hindsight and all that you now understand about your “genius, obsession and mania,” what would you tell parents of children going through similar experiences during adolescence?
Don’t enable them. Don’t be afraid to cut them off—it could save their life.
If you were speaking to a group of young teens about the angst of being a teen and why drugs or alcohol are not the answer, what would you tell them and what would you suggest they do, instead?
Encourage them to try new things, get into hobbies to expel their energy. For me it was cooking but it could be anything—reading, sports, you name it. Just get out there and do things, stay busy, create your recipe for sobriety.
You shared a great deal about what your parents did to try help you along the way, what they did that you thought was unhelpful and then what they did when you called, ready for help. Can you please expand on this?
It wasn’t until my parents cut me off that I finally learned my lesson. I know how hard it must have been for them to turn me away but it was precisely that which lead me to rock bottom and my turning point. I had lost everything so there was literally nowhere to go but up.
Describe a bit about what your parents and sister went through – how their lives were changed by your addiction – and what they’ve done to help themselves through all of this?
My addiction put my family through hell and back and I am grateful every day for my relationship with them now. When we all realized that this was a disease, and not a choice, it was scary but freeing. As a family, we have to deal with my disease and I have to work on keeping myself healthy—just like any other illness. It makes us stronger and closer.
You describe what it took for you in the beginning of your recovery and then your need to re-up your efforts later on. Please share what you initially did, why you felt you needed to re-commit and what you do today to stay centered in your recovery.
I have been doing the same thing from the moment I turned my life around—I call it my “recipe” for success. Essentially it’s cooking, working, family time, meetings, music…just things I love. I actually detailed this recipe, all my “healthy obsessions,” in a story I wrote for Psychology Today. You can check it out here.
What is the most important thing you’d like readers to take away after reading your book?
We need to rid the stigma of addiction. I want people to know that you don’t choose addiction, it chooses you. And it can choose anyone—lawyers, chefs, anyone. But more so, I want people to know there is light at the end of the tunnel. Whether its you, a family member, or a distant friend, there is a way out. Anything is possible if you work at it.
Thank you so much, Jesse, for agreeing to this interview and congratulations on your memoir, restaurants and other successes, and most of all, on your recovery!
Readers wanting to learn more about Jesse and his work should visit his website, Jesse Schenker.com. To purchase his new book, click on Where to Purchase All or Nothing: One Chef’s Appetite for the Extremes. You can also follow him on Twitter and Facebook.
For More About Jesse Schenker’s memoir, including a book trailer and early reviews, quoting from Amazon site…
Jesse Schenker’s new book, “All or Nothing: One Chef’s Appetite for the Extreme”
About All or Nothing: Schenker’s culinary memoir illuminates the highs and lows of addiction, anxiety, and ambition all against the backdrop of the fascinating, fast-pace restaurant industry. He frames the book in culinary terms that guide the reader through each passage of time and turbulence, from a “coddled” childhood to “pressure cooking,” representing his rapid stumble into serious addiction, to “dry aged” exhaustion and clarity. Growing up in wealthy suburban Florida, Schenker realized his love for cooking at an early age when he began preparing meticulous, homespun meals with his grandmother. Soon later, when introduced to marijuana, he discovered the same sense of calm that he found in the kitchen—and threw himself into a drug habit with the same force he had brought to cooking. His culinary experience grew and so did his drug use. The habit quickly snowballed into an addiction to opiates, heroin and crack; dropping out of high school and eventually being alienated from his family and wanted by the cops. By twenty-one, he had robbed, cheated, and lied to everyone in his life—and had overdosed, been shot at and nearly beaten to death. His eventual arrest and re-focus on cooking in prison motivated him to get clean. He learned to channel his obsessiveness by putting all of his energy into his first addiction and true passion—food. With the same insatiable appetite for the extreme, he dominated several restaurant kitchens, fighting anxiety and panic attacks along the way, and making his way to rising-stardom. Despite all odds, thirty-one-year-old Schenker is a James Beard Rising Star semifinalist, beat Chef celebrity chef Geoffrey Zakarian in an Iron Chef battle, was included in Forbes’s “30 Under 30” and voted Best New Chef by New York magazine, owns and operates Recette (named Best New Restaurant by The New York Times) and the Gander, and is married with two children.
Lisa Frederiksen
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So true – who would choose addiction? It does choose you. It chose me. What we do about it can depend a great deal upon the kind of support we get from family and friends and their understanding of addiction. Thanks Jesse for your book & Lisa for another great interview & article.
Hi Lisa and Jesse,
What a great interview. I do enjoy reading about positive recovery stories. This line stood out to me as well – “I want people to know that you don’t choose addiction, it chooses you.” Thanks so much for sharing your story, Jesse!
I grew up with an addict (my brother) who died at 42 so this is coming from one perspective. I hate addicts and think they belong on an island by themselves. They lie, steal, cheat, do derelict acts all in the name of drugs. Many do not tell you what they really do to survive. Think of the lowest of the low and that is it. This man had great parents, parents I only wish I had. My brother who died probably wished the same. He is one of the fortunate few who survived. I only hope he continues. Many relapse even after ten or twenty years. I wanted more food read in the book. All his drug stories, heard them, seen them all before.
Please explain how addiction chooses you. How naive. Very few things chose you. YOU make them happen in most cases. When your only child dies, it doesnt chose you, it happens. When you get cancer, it doesnt chose you it happens. Addiction in my opinion is self serving. You can make it better or you can make it worse. Most make it worse. I will tell you what I tell some people who think their story is the worst, take a walk in any urban children’s hospital, any floor, see innocent children who are suffering or dying and their desperate families. Did this chose them? I believe not any of what you say. j