Help for Families | Secondhand Drinking | Codependency
What to Say to Someone With a Drinking Problem
What to say to someone with a drinking problem? Where to begin! If you’re reading this post, you have likely been hurt, frustrated, concerned, angered, and/or scared by a loved one’s drinking. You’ve likely tried talking, yelling, cajoling, negotiating, looking the other way, believing their promise(s) to stop or cut down, but so far, nothing’s…
Read MoreWhy Was His Abuse So Extreme?
“Why was his abuse so extreme?” was the question recently asked by a reader of one of my blog posts. She had described her loved one’s behaviors over the course of several years, a loved one who had a severe alcohol use disorder. His behaviors directed at her were so mean-spirited, despicable, and twisted, and…
Read MoreChildren’s Books to Help Talk About Trauma | ACEs
“Do you know of any children’s books to help talk about trauma | ACEs?” asked one of the attendees at a recent presentation I gave. It was titled, Building Resilience Through Understanding Substance Use Disorder and It’s Impacts on Others. It was one in a series of three talks I’m giving on this topic. In this case it was for the San Joaquin County Office of Education and the San Joaquin County Children’s Services Coordinating Commission.
Read MoreEating Disorders and ACEs | #ComeAsYouAre
Understanding the connection between eating disorders and ACEs (Adverse Childhood Experiences) formed the basis of the final stage of my bulimia recovery. The #ComeAsYouAre hashtag on Instagram shared in this post title was part of the National Eating Disorders Association’s (NEAD) 2019 Eating Disorders Awareness Week. As NEAD explained its objective, For us, Come as…
Read MoreWhat Children of Addiction Need to Know | COA Awareness Week
What children of addiction need to know is that it’s not their fault. To that end, NACoA is celebrating Children of Addiction Awareness Week (COA Week) February 10 – 16 this year. A 501 (c)(3) Membership Organization, the National Association for Children of Addiction (NACoA) has been working for over 30 years “to eliminate the…
Read MoreAbout Those Character Defects – 12 Step Addiction Recovery
About those character defects — you know — the ones you identified in your “searching and fearless moral inventory” when you worked Step 4 of a 12 step recovery program, like AA or NA. Those same character defects you were “entirely ready to have God remove” when you did your Step 6. I’d like to…
Read MoreCognitive Distortions – When Reality Isn’t What You Think | Darlene Lancer, JD, MFT
Cognitive distortions, like overgeneralizing, labeling, self-criticism, and black-and-white/all-or-nothing thinking, can “skew your perceptions” and may be caused by “the anxiety, depression, low self-esteem, or perfectionism that often accompany codependency.” Darlene Lancer, a frequent guest blogger on BreakingTheCycles.com, helps readers understand cognitive distortions, how they harm us, and what a person can do to stop or…
Read More5 Tips to Change a Drinking Pattern and Make This New Year’s Resolution Stick
It’s that time of year when many of us make New Year’s Resolutions. For some it’s about adding more exercise. For some, it’s about eating more nutrient rich foods. And for others, it’s about their drinking. Should they stop all together? Can they just cut down? What can they do to successfully change how much…
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