Posts Tagged ‘codependency’
Detach. Detach With Love. You’ve Got to Be Kidding!
Detach with love? You can’t be serious?! After ALL they’ve done to me — no way! I’ve been in so many situations where my heart goes out to the wives, husbands, children and parents of loved ones with alcohol or other drug use disorders (aka alcoholism or addiction) who are brand new to this journey…
Read MoreAlcohol By Volume (ABV) and “Proof” Explained
Alcohol By Volume (ABV) can be very difficult to determine. (Another term you often hear related to ABV is “proof.”) But it’s an important concept to understand in order to stay in control of one’s drinking, which is why I have updated my 2011 post on this topic. I’m updating this post because one of…
Read MoreFears for Children When Divorcing an Alcoholic
The thought of divorcing an alcoholic * is terrifying for so many reasons, but when one has children, it can be paralyzing. Time and again I receive phone calls and emails from spouses expressing fears like these: “I am terrified to divorce because my children aren’t safe with him/her they drink.” “He drinks and drives…
Read MoreHidden Half-Empty Bottles – Should I Dump Them Out or ???
Some variation of this question comes up often, “I found hidden half-empty bottles of vodka all over the house. Should I dump them out? I did that the last time, and he accused me of snooping…not trusting him.” I remember that sick, kicked-in-the-gut feeling when I found my loved ones’ hidden half-empty bottles. Sometimes I’d…
Read MoreChildren of Alcoholics | Guest Author Darlene Lancer
Children of alcoholics grow up – obviously. But what is not fully understood is the trauma they may have experienced growing up with a parent with severe alcohol use disorder (aka an alcoholic) and how that trauma affects their lives unless treated. Frequent guest author, Darlene Lancer, JD, MFT, explains this in her post below,…
Read MoreThe Boundaries We Keep
The boundaries we keep and the kinds of boundaries we make can return our lives to sanity. That’s a bold statement to be sure. Yet it’s the only thing that can help someone coping with a loved one’s drinking take back their life — their physical and emotional health and the quality of life they…
Read MoreWhy Codependents Find It Hard to Receive
Why codependents find it hard to receive is a question answered in today’s post by frequent guest author, Darlene Lancer, JD, MFT. As Darlene writes, “Codependents, find it hard to receive. Codependents are more comfortable giving or even self-sacrificing than receiving. Yet they wonder why they’re….” Darlene is the author of Codependency for Dummies and Conquering Shame and…
Read MoreHealing the Wounds of Codependency
Healing the wounds of codependency is critically important for family members and friends of loved ones with alcohol or other drug use disorders. What this means and how to do it is explained in today’s post by Darlene Lancer, JD, MFT, a frequent guest author on this site. As Darlene writes, [until healed] “We continue…
Read More